Take Time to Appreciate Dance

As many of you may know, dance has been a big part of my life in addition to tennis and also volleyball. I really enjoyed dancing when I was younger and ever since my honors seminar started, which is on dance and everyday movement, I realized just how much I miss dance. I’ve gained so much respect for dancers and the art of dance itself and have come to appreciate dance so much. It’s a beautiful, wonderful, and fun aspect of movement and life too!

Regardless of who you are, I believe that you can all find some way to appreciate dance. I know that many athletes have been a part of some dance class during their life. It’s good for coordination, strength, and balance. Most children nowadays even take some form of a dance class when they’re little! In one way or another, we’ve all danced during our lives and enjoyed it.

So on that note, I’d just like to ask you all to take some time to appreciate dance. Whether it’s helped you move better, was a hobby, is something you’re doing currently, or is even something you’re not really into, I want you to take time to explore dance. Tap is really fun and personally a favorite of mine. Ballet is beautiful and it’s amazing to see the strength in the dancers. Jazz is high-energy and so much fun to watch. And also hip hop is really fun and different with its isolated and sharp movements.

As I’ve discussed in my honors seminar, dance is for everyone. Any person with any body type can dance, and that doesn’t mean that they have to dance professionally. As long as you’re having fun and expressing yourself, you’re dancing. As long as you’re connecting your movements with your thoughts and feelings, you’re dancing. As long as you’re moving with some rhythm, you’re dancing.

James Howe once said, “Life is short and there will always be dirty dishes, so let’s dance.” Keep that in mind this week and go have fun. And as always, if you have a question or idea for a blog post, let me know! I’m always happy to hear from you all. 🙂 Have a wonderful week everyone! Also, spring break is upon us! WOOHOO!

These Are a Few of My Favorite Things

a few of my favorite things

Lately, I’ve been thinking about changing the name of this blog. It’s always been about my favorite things, ranging from the activities and sports I’ve participated in to my favorite animals and things to do but I feel like it’s also about so much more than a few of my favorite things. It’s really become a place for me to share all of the things I like and share a little about my life. There hasn’t been much poetry around here lately, so I thought I’d just share a poem I wrote recently about a few of my favorite things.

Snow sitting on trees during the cold months of winter,
And fuzzy warm socks and boots.
Disney movies, I sure love them all,
And strawberries, pineapple, all fruits.

My family, my dogs, and my bird,
Do sure mean a lot to me.
Hawaii, New Mexico, Colorado,
Are all places I love to be.

Fuzzy yellow balls and Wilson rackets,
Doubles with my sister for sure.
Dance and volleyball too,
My love for reading has no cure.

Writing blogs for my website,
Studying biology too,
Editing papers for others,
Also the color pastel blue.

Spending time with family,
Making honest, loyal friends,
Being healthy and happy,
Loving life til it ends.

These are a few of my favorite things,
This list could go on and on.
Each day is a blessing and I’m thankful for all,
And this beautiful Earth we all live upon.

I hope you all have a wonderful week and take some time to think about a few of your own favorite things! If you also think I should change the name of my blog, feel free to leave an idea in the comments or reach out to me on my contact page. As always, have a wonderful week! 🙂

Eating Healthy in College

eating healthy in college
Haha, I tried to get a picture of my lunch from Thursday. That was successful and you also get a little blur from my finger. Good job me, good job.

You’ve heard me mention this before: the freshman 15. Plenty of freshmen struggle with their eating habits upon entering college. There’s so much food available ALL the time and they abuse that. And they eat, and eat, and eat, and before you know it, they’ve gained 15 pounds, hence the freshman 15.

If you’ve been reading my blog since I started college at CSU, you will know that I was determined to avoid the freshman 15, and so far I’ve been successful and actually lost about 15 pounds. With a combination of working out and proper eating, I’ve been able to accomplish this goal. Exercise is extremely important to maintaining a healthy lifestyle, but it’s also so so so important to eat right. Here’s what has worked for me:

  1. Drink lots of water. Whenever I go to the dining halls, I typically get water and I do my best to drink at least two full cups of water. Occasionally I will drink some iced tea or lemonade but I really try to stay away from the sweet drinks, especially soda. Water is not only good for your skin and body in general but it helps fill you up a bit so you don’t overeat.
  2. Make your plate colorful. While fried food is super duper good tasting, it’s not so good for your body. In moderation, it’s fine, but if the color of the foods on your plate are all a fried brown, you’re doing something wrong. Add some vegetables or fruit to that plate or add a salad. Your body will thank you. Strive for this with every meal and pay attention to the variety of foods you eat throughout the day.
  3. Leave the dining hall feeling not hungry and not stuffed. The wording on that statement might be a little weird, so I’ll do my best to explain what I mean. With eating from dining halls in college, you definitely don’t want to starve yourself. You shouldn’t starve yourself, period! You want to be balanced with the food you eat. If you’re piling on the food and coming back to a table with multiple full plates, you might want to rethink that. Just think about balance and remember that you can always grab a to-go box if you start to feel full. 🙂
  4. Eat desserts in moderation. At the dining halls at CSU, there’s a place dedicated to desserts and I’m sure that it’s that way with most schools. Seeing the rows of cookies upon cookies and plates of cakes and brownies can be extremely tempting, but remember, eat these in moderation! Desserts also taste AMAZING and sometimes its really hard to only take one serving and limit yourself, but all of that sugar really isn’t that good for you or your teeth. Treat yourself every once in a while but don’t go nuts with the desserts.
  5. Seek nutritional advice through your university. Colorado State University has an “Eat Well” program and they have dietitians and nutritionists willing to help figure out foods that you’ll enjoy that are better for your body. In addition to this, all of the menus for food are available online so I have access to the nutritional facts. I don’t pay too much attention to this, but sometimes it’s a great resource for knowing more about calories (even though I’m not big on calorie counting) and nutritional values in general. Most college dining halls have resources like this and within the dining halls themselves, there’s typically information on all of the foods available so pay attention to these! Use your resources and you’ll be set.

Keep in mind, that these are things that I’ve found helpful and they may work for those of you also eating out of college dining halls, and some of them might not, and that’s ok! Find something that works for you and stick to it. Eating healthy in college is important because it helps set the foundation for eating healthy later in life and it’s important that you give your body the materials it needs to function at its best!

If you’ve got an idea for a blog post or a question for me, feel free to leave a comment on this post or reach out to me on my new “Contact Me!” page which can be accessed in the menu above. I’d be happy to hear from you. I hope you all have a great week! See ya next Sunday. 🙂

Early Birthday Celebrations

This weekend, I went home again. After my first lab practical and 300 level class exam, it was well-deserved, let me tell ya. In addition to that, my mom’s birthday is this upcoming Wednesday, and since I won’t be there for her actual birthday, I wanted to celebrate this weekend!

It’s always good to go home and escape the food of college dining halls as well as the clutter and small spaces associated with residence halls. I have a very nice room at school but still, a change of scenery and a chance to get away is nice. 🙂 My dad and sister came to pick me up Friday night and our drive home was accompanied by a lovely snow storm and slow, slow, SLOW traffic on I-25.

We eventually got home and I was greeted by my mom, grandma, Marty, Boo, and Bobo. There was a lot of good food. Woohoo! On Saturday, I spent a good majority of the day with my sister and we even had the chance to play tennis together again. Haha, it was funny to play with her again mostly because she’s been playing all winter, and the last time I really played was a month ago. She kicked my butt that’s for sure. I really am thankful to be able to play in a warm, indoor facility in the winter with some wonderful people, especially my dad and sister. Allyson and I played Mario Kart too which is always fun (especially Mario Kart 8 on the Nintendo Switch!) and I really enjoyed being with my best friend for a while again.

Sunday was where the true festivities were. On top of grocery shopping for me, my mom, grandma, sister, and I went prom dress shopping for Allyson and also found my dress for the Miss Colorado USA pageant in October (yes, I’m competing again!). We meant to buy some popcorn while we were at the mall but that didn’t happen. Oh well, the Starbucks drinks were still yummy. The day honestly flew and before I knew it, I was eating ribs and salad with my family and a delicious salted-caramel, chocolate cream pie in honor of my mom’s birthday. And now, here I am back in my room at school preparing for another week at school.

Only three more weeks until spring break and then before we know it, my first year of college will be over! Time sure flies when you’re having fun. Mom, if you read this post, I love you so much and wish you the best on your birthday. You truly are the best mom in the world and I’m so grateful to have you in my life.

I hope you all have a wonderful week and are getting a break from the cold, snowy weather. Also, if you have an idea for a blog post, have any questions, or just wanna say hi, feel free to leave a comment or contact me on my new page up above in the menu. See you all next week!

When Things Don’t Go Your Way: College Exams

college exams

So this past week, I had my first exam for my second semester of general chemistry. I studied super hard for it and took several practice tests. My study group and I worked through any confusion we had and just like that, Wednesday (exam day) rolled around. During the exam, I felt super confident. After the exam, I felt super confident. Seeing my grade on Friday, I didn’t feel confident at all. Why college exams?! Why??

It was truly devastating to see my hard work go down the drain like that but sometimes you work really hard and you don’t get the results you asked for or worked toward. From what I’ve learned, that’s a part of life! It sucks, but you have to learn to move on and not make the same mistakes down the road.

Hearing all of my friends do well on the exam crushed me and honestly, after seeing my grade, I was feeling pretty down. One of the things I learned from this experience is that grades matter, but they don’t define you. This is something that high school teachers drilled into our heads but it didn’t sink in until now. A test is a test and I know that I have a better understanding of the chemistry material than was reflected by my grade.

Also, from this experience, I’ve learned that it’s okay to not say anything about how a test went. If a friend asks about how it goes, it’s honestly none of their business. My grade and circumstances are my grade and circumstances while their grades and circumstances are their own thing. For myself and other people who have been in this situation, it’s important to understand that we are our own human beings and we all mess up in our own ways. The only people we can compare ourselves to are ourselves.

So now looking forward to this next exam, I’m not going to bite myself in the butt for my last unfortunate performance. I’m going to study just as hard and take what I’ve learned from this experience. The only way to go from here is up with my grade in chemistry. This isn’t the way I planned to start off my semester in general chemistry II but it is what it is!

College exams can be a real kicker and sometimes, you don’t know what you’re going to get. You do know that you’ll always come away from an exam with more knowledge though, regardless of the outcome. This not only relates to college exams, but it can relate to many other things in life. It’s important to remember that you learn from everything you do and it’s all about a growth mindset. Keep this in mind!

If you’ve got an idea for a blog post don’t be afraid to leave a comment on my new page, “Contact Me!”. You’ll find this page in the menu above. 🙂 And even if you don’t have an idea and just want to say hi or ask a question, that’s okay too. Have a good week everyone!

My Dance History

Here’s the song that my solo was to. The dance was only two minutes but the song itself is around five. Enjoy 🙂

Hi everyone! Just a quick note before this post: this piece is something I put together for my honors seminar on movement and dance. So, there might be a couple of quotes and also a works cited at the bottom of this. Haha sorry but plagiarism is no joke! I also have to cite myself to avoid self-plagiarism. What a world! Anyway, we were asked to reflect on our movement history and for this, I focused more on dance. Honestly, if I involved everything, this would be a 400 page novel. I hope you enjoy!

At the age of four, my parents enrolled me in ballet classes at the School of Ballet Nouveau Colorado. It was no surprise that I began ballet classes at a young age considering that my mom also took ballet classes until she was fifteen. Ballet has always been a passion of my mom’s and tennis and volleyball have always been my dad’s passions so there was absolutely bound to be activity in my life. My mom wanted a place for me to be active, make friends, and develop good posture and flexibility, so ballet was the first activity for me to try. I was always on the move as a child and so my mom figured ballet would be the perfect place to become connected with my movement and experiment with the different, more graceful movements associated with ballet.

As a toddler I excelled in my basic, baby ballet classes. My teachers praised me for my long legs and posture and quickly advanced me. I soon found myself working on tendus, battements, and pliés at the barre with the six year olds, which was quite intimidating considering that some of the girls were a foot taller than me. I feel that I was at an advantage because of how my parents raised me. I was a very sheltered and protected child who received a lot of love and care from both of my parents. The love, care, and attention from my parents, all “environmental factors”, contributed to how aware I was of my body as a four year old and helped me pick up ballet and all other activities I participated in easily. The attention and support from my parents allowed me to understand that I was taking ballet classes for fun and to enjoy being a kid over anything that some ballet school or society expected of me. I danced at Ballet Nouveau until I was six and then I wouldn’t dance again for another four years.

When I turned ten, I began taking hip hop classes at a local dance studio. The new loud, different music and quick, sharp movements proved to be much more challenging for me, but I stuck with it. This time around I was much less afraid of the older kids and I used being the youngest to my advantage. When we first began learning dances, I acted as a copycat to the girl standing in front of me. Her movements became my movements and her expressions became my expressions. The hip hop world appeared to be quite different from the culture and background I was accustomed to but it was fresh, exciting, and fun to explore. Like with the girl in my hip hop class, I became a mini replica of the hip hop dancers I watched on the internet, following their every move. This technical approach allowed me to “copy a dance technique that [was] identified and valued as worthwhile for training”  and once I became more confident in my abilities, I added my own expression and personality to my movements. After my first hip hop performance on stage at my studio’s recital, I felt so invigorated and proud. I knew that I wanted to continue dancing. The following dance season, I made the competition hip hop team at my dance studio and loved every second of it. That team went on to win gold and platinum for both of our dances at two of the three competitions we competed at in the spring. I competed with the same hip hop team for another dance season and even added tap to my repertoire.

After those two dance seasons, volleyball and dance overwhelmed my schedule so I was unable to dance with my studio’s competitive teams, but I was able to perform a solo at the recital. As “Dancing Shoes” by DEV played at the recital, I gained more air off of each leap that I performed. My heart pounded to the beat of the music as I looked out past the bright lights to find my parents and sister in the crowd. As my solo came to an end, I could really do nothing but smile. I had truly missed dancing for a year and so having the opportunity to perform a solo I had worked so hard on was incredible. Dance was no longer just a hobby to me, but it had become an art form. Dance had meant something special to me with my past competitive dance seasons but it had become something powerful after my solo. Dance had evolved to become a celebration of experience and progress. Dance could “function as entertainment [or] therapy” for when I felt bored, sad, angry, or even happy. This gave me a deeper appreciation of the sport and art that I had spent hours practicing and dedicating my life too.

The next competitive dance season, I was able to join my studio’s competitive teams again. I had added jazz and lyrical to my list of classes too. In addition to all of these classes and training, I was also taking ballet and technique classes in order to strengthen my muscles and perfect every little movement to appear flawless onstage. One of my most vivid dance memories was from my Thursday night technique class when I had already been in the studio for three hours and was finishing my night. I was exhausted and my teacher had us working on tours en seconde. I was struggling to get the rhythm down and kept losing momentum. All of the other girls in my technique class were executing tours en seconde beautifully and I was not. As I was getting ready to leave the studio that night, my teacher pulled me over and we had a conversation about my struggles. She noticed that I was frustrated and talked with me about my tours en seconde. My teacher told me that I shouldn’t compare myself to the other girls or stress about the situation. She helped me feel much more relaxed and less worried about how I danced in comparison to others. Society often builds us up to compare ourselves to others when looking at flawless people in magazines and on TV and social media, but that is not the real world. Realizing that the only person I need to compare myself to is me was enlightening. This helped me realize that I need to let go of my tensions when dancing and working on new skills. I learned that the mind will “guide the body through the imperfections of the movement” and this idea enabled me to feel more confident in my dancing abilities and allowed me to grow my passion for dance because I was dancing for myself, not for the approval of others.

Unfortunately, that competitive season of dance would be my last. During competitive season, I injured my foot either in ballet or jazz class. I performed all season in pain thinking that the injury was no big deal. My injury was unfortunately no pulled muscle or overworked joint but a bone fracture that eventually wiped out my possibilities of ever going on pointe. (Those of you that have been around know about this one!) It also made dancing competitively at the level I previously danced at practically impossible because of all of the strain and impact my foot and ankle would suffer. So from that point until now, I have danced but not like I once did. I have worked to come back to dance as best I can but even through training, my ankle will never be the same. I’ve learned to accept that “some differences between [physical capabilities] need to be celebrated rather than fought” and I’ve come to appreciate the experiences and opportunities dance gave me while I was still a healthy dancer.

Through dance, my mom was able to live through me and my dad was able to experience a sport he’d never dealt with much. My sister was able to have a friend to dance alongside and I was able to share my passion for dance with my family and friends when they asked me to perform for them at family get-togethers. While I may not be able to dance as well as I used to, I still play tennis and maintain the high level of activity and discipline that dance instilled in me. I still enjoy the sense of rhythm and ability to explore movement as well as the many wonderful cultures dance is associated with. I may no longer be the little Polichinelle I once was or ever become the Clara I could’ve been, but I can still watch both girls on old videos and the internet and love the movement and music and art for what it is.

Horvath, A. (2019). Every Body Has a History. Unpublished manuscript, Colorado State University
Nadel, Myron Howard, and Marc Raymond Strauss. The Dance Experience Insights into History, Culture, and Creativity. Princeton Book Company, 2014.
Schrader, Constance A. A Sense of Dance: Exploring Your Movement Potential. Champaign, IL: Human Kinetics, 2005.

When Your Dorm Room Becomes An Aquarium

aquarium and ecosystem of my little shrimps and snails
On the far right, in the last jar, you can see one of my snails saying hello. 🙂 If you look hard enough, you may be able to see a shrimp. They’re very hard to find, mostly because most of them are fairly transparent.

So you might be asking yourself, “Did her dorm room flood?”. The answer to that is no, thank goodness. For my honors ecology class, we were asked to make five small ecosystems. We could do this in what ever way we wanted to using the jars provided. Other than that the only other rules were that the ecosystems are closed, meaning that the jars remain shut, and that we cannot use invertebrates.

For my closed ecosystems, I chose to use cherry shrimp, ghost shrimp, and Japanese algae eater shrimp. I also used zebra nerve snails. For plants, I’m not quite sure what my longer plant is, but I know that the moss I got was java moss, which the shrimp and snails enjoy.

Last weekend, I went home to set up my miniature aquariums and spent a lot of time at PetCo and online, doing a lot of research on all of my little fellas. Ghost shrimp are actually really cool, weird creatures and so are all of the other shrimp and snails I got. The project was due this past Friday and so when I came back up to CSU last weekend, I became a mother to 13 little snails and shrimp together. They were all in their little ecosystems and throughout their time with me, I tried to give them as much light as possible, so that the plants could photosynthesize and provide all of my shrimp and snails with enough oxygen and food.

Unfortunately, my cherry shrimp and ghost shrimp passed away before I even handed in my ecosystems, but that’s ok, I guess that my snails will have more food and nutrients available to them. RIP Cherry and Ghosty Goo (name courtesy of my sister).

The goal of this project is to create ecosystems that are self-sustaining and will support life up until the end of this semester. I’m not totally optimistic about how my ecosystems will do, but the process of making each little aquarium or ecosystem was really fun and insightful. I’m hoping I don’t kill any other shrimp and that I don’t lose any snails in this process either. We’ll see how this goes! Have a good week everyone.

A Bit More About Me

about me

These kinds of posts are always fun for me to write. I wish that there was a way for me to able to get to know all of you, my readers a little better, but I’m not quite sure how! There’s a post I wrote in 2017 sharing a couple of facts about myself, and I feel like there’s a lot you still don’t know, so here’s some more stuff about me that you might wanna know! Check out the link that I’ve attached to read that post too. 🙂

  1. I’m 5′ 8″. When I was younger, I also grew waaaaay too fast. My body had a lot of fun adjusting to that.
  2. I’m a biology major at Colorado State University. I’m in the honors program also and I’m on the pre-dental track.
  3. The Selection by Kiera Cass is my all-time favorite book series ever.
  4. I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 17. I was sick the day I went in for my picture also, so it’s a terrifying little card to look at. Haha.
  5. I love boots. My favorite brand currently is Freebird but I also enjoy a good pair of fuzzy, warm UGGs. Ankle boots, combat boots, knee high boots, you name them and I probably have them… I actually want to get a job at Freebird over the summer so I can get discounts on their boots and just be around a super cute store. 🙂
  6. I’m missing a tear duct in my right eye. I can still cry out of my right eye, it just means that it’s constantly teary. So I get the question, “Have you been crying” or “Are you okay?” frequently. Thanks genetics!
  7. I still hate oatmeal. The texture is just not a favorite. I also have a really hard time eating yogurt. It’s just something about the texture as I eat it over time…
  8. I made the Dean’s List my first semester of college. Woohoo!
  9. Holographic things intrigue me a lot. I can thank one of my favorite YouTubers, Simply Nailogical for that.
  10. I’d love to see Maria Sharapova, Rafael Nadal, and Novak Djokovic play in person. I’ve seen them play on TV and they’re just amazing players, but I would just be over the moon if I had the opportunity to actually watch them play. Also, this might totally be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t like Serena Williams as a tennis player! Her style just doesn’t impress me. I respect her, but I just don’t like her.

So I hope you enjoyed these ten facts about me. Some of them are pretty random, but they’re kinda fun and silly and I hope you enjoyed them and learned something new on this Sunday haha. Have a wonderful week everyone!

Back To School!

What a wonderful winter break it has been! After five weeks at home, I am headed back to school tomorrow. There are no classes tomorrow, but I do want a little bit of time to get settled back in and get all of my textbooks and materials. And in honor of the big “challenge” going around, here’s me in 2009 and 2019. Ten years does fly by! Anyway, here’s a recap of my first college winter break.

Over break, there are a lot of fun things that my family and I did. For one, we spent another great Christmas with family in New Mexico. This year we went to see the luminarias in my grandpa’s neighborhood and those were really pretty. Spending all of that time with family was just really nice and really fun. I always enjoy catching up with my aunt and uncle and sharing all of my accomplishments with my grandpa. We also had our annual Christmas morning breakfast at my great-aunt’s house and that’s always so much fun. The food is always delicious (ESPECIALLY her cheesy potatoes) and the company is always great.

After Christmas, things winded down and we awaited the new year. My sister and I recreated Bob Ross paintings of his painting, “In the Midst of Winter” and that was really fun. Oil paint is so messy, wow! While we did spend plenty of time recreating his painting, we also spent A LOT of time cleaning up the paint from our kitchen table and ourselves. That stuff is hard to clean up, let me tell ya.

In addition to unleashing our inner artists, my sister and I played plenty of tennis. We hit with our dad which is always a great time and I also had the opportunity to hit with some of the ladies at my club. It was refreshing to play against ladies with different playing styles. They challenged me and helped me adapt to become an even more well-rounded and educated tennis player. I’ve really loved growing with tennis, especially over this break. I really do love the sport! Allyson and I also had the opportunity to attend an open court at Denver Tennis Park, which is a brand new tennis facility right off the University of Denver Campus. We really enjoyed getting to play with other kids and show off our skills.

I also had the opportunity to experiment with some stuff for my modeling. I am truly interested in pursuing modeling, even if I do not take it on as my full-time job. Recently, my sister helped me take a few new pictures and send some of my stuff off to new agencies. I’m excited to see what comes from these opportunities and how I continue to grow as a person from all of this.

My sister and I also dogsat over both of our winter breaks and, oh boy, did that prove to be QUITE the job. Four dogs in one small house can sure make a BIG mess. We did enjoy our time with the four dogs, but oh my goodness, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to step foot in that house again. The male dogs fought frequently and it was a stressful situation to be in a lot of the time my sister and I went over to check on the dogs. Like I said though, we really enjoyed being able to help our neighbors out and I’m glad that all of the dogs are happy and healthy!

And just like that, my winter break was over. Another Christmas and New Year celebration flew by and I now sit here writing this blog about how I go back to school tomorrow. Back to the grind! Have a good week everyone. 🙂

Knowing What’s Real in the Modeling and Acting Industries

modeling

Before I get started on this post, I would like to make it clear that I am not trying to trash any particular agency or group. I am simply sharing my experience and hopefully helping those who are interested in the modeling and acting industries stay away from scams and fakes. There are a lot of great agencies and people out there who will truly help you get what you want and there are also a lot of agencies and people who are completely in it for the money.

If the modeling and/or acting industries are something you are interested in getting into, I HIGHLY recommend doing as much research as you can on the various agencies in your area and in your state or country. I recommend learning about which agencies are legit and which are not. I recommend reading about the strengths of each agency and seeing if they are the best fit for you and what you want. Remember that you SHOULD NEVER be asked to pay to attend an audition or casting if the agency is legit. You should also never have to pay to join an agency. Any contracts signed or deals made should involve no payments on your part.

Onto my story now. I’ve been a part of an agency in Denver for the past couple of years that required me to pay to attend a “modeling” school for 60 hours. That part should have IMMEDIATELY been a red flag to my family and I but we went on with it because the deal seemed very legit. You attend the modeling/acting school every other Saturday until you complete the course and then you get a contract with the agency tied to the school and then you have the opportunity to get local work as a model or actor. This agency also attends an “international” modeling and acting convention which gives aspiring models and actors the opportunity to showcase themselves before casting directors and various agencies from around the world. To this day, I still question the legitimacy of many of the agencies that attend the convention. There are a couple of agencies that attend this particular convention that I know are real but I’m still a bit iffy. And guess what? If you’re selected to be a part of this “elite team” to attend the convention, YOU HAVE TO PAY TO GO. Hmmmmm. Even more fishy now, right?

Ever since that trip in 2016 (I think?) I have been on the hunt for a better agency and I’m working on it, but I have to wait until my contract finishes with this agency. This past year, I dealt with some extremely odd incidents with them. About part way through the year, my mom received an email that they had dropped me. There was no explanation. So my mom called the agency and they explained that my contract had expired and that I was no longer with them. They told me that they would still love to represent me though and see me again in classes. Interestingly enough though, my contract had not expired… We moved on from that and continued with the agency and that brings me to yesterday now.

Yesterday, I attended a pre-casting for our upcoming fashion week at my agency. They were worried about sending too many models to the actual audition so they help a pre-audition. Fair enough. I arrived and walked before the agency director and her secretary and all of the other models in the pre-casting. I have been practicing my walking for months and I know that I’ve been putting the work in, since I competed at Miss Colorado USA last October. After all of the models walked, the director made a decision and I was not selected to attend the actual casting.

That part didn’t bug me. It was the comments after. My director stood before all of the models after the decisions were made and said that she was highly disappointed in some of her previous convention attendees (like myself). She mentioned being embarrassed and then recommended I come back for more classes! I know that I’ve worked hard to have the body I currently do and I know that my runway walk was better than half of the models that were picked to attend the real casting! And while I do want to give credit to some of the girls that walked at that precasting that should walk at a big fashion week event like the one coming up, many of the models there would NEVER be cast for something like that if they were with a legit agency.

I find it extremely frustrating that I allowed myself to get into a situation like this and I hope that those of you reading this who aspire to be actors or actresses or models learn to be careful and not make the same mistakes I have. I feel that somehow, I belong in either the modeling or acting world and I will continue to put my best foot forward and put myself out there. Now though, I know that I will never allow what happened to me to ever happen again. Have a good week.